At risk of sharing too much, I have been snipped. I’m mostly sharing because despite tons of Googling, I had a hard time figuring out exactly what was going to happen, how I’d feel, and recovery would look like. Hopefully my timeline helps at least one person out there. I know other with vastly different timelines, but mine seems to fall somewhere in the middle of them.
We’re happy at two kids. I can’t foresee any life change occurring that would make me want to make another.
Why not a tube tie?
It’s far less invasive and cheaper. We’re on a HDHP so I don’t know if insurance covers it and it doesn’t really matter. Oddly, it’s generally harder to get this paid for on a standard plan than the 8x more expensive operation for a woman. We’re backwards. Oh and the biggest reason is we don’t want more kids. Two is a wonderful number.
A good shaving, take a shower prior to heading in just to be a nice guy.
Nurse will come in, make small talk to ease your anxiety, you’ll undress from waist down with a sheet over top, doctor will come in, put some of that rust-colored antibacterial stuff all over your groin, give you two injections of anesthetic, and within seconds you feel nothing. I’m not sure how he knew, but doctor gave me what felt like a little poke, asked me if I felt it, and answered his own question “Nope, you didn’t.” Was that the incision!? I’ll never know. Anyway, my I did ask for details, but I’m pretty sure I had to more common no-scalpel version performed. I only have one incision, but I do have stitches. I dunno. Doesn’t matter.
The needle is the most “painful” thing you’ll feel. On one side I barely felt anything and the other there was a tiny poke. No big deal.
From them on, you hopefully feel nothing other than some tugging and clamping, and within 15-20 minutes you’ll be cleaning off and standing up, slowly. The tugs are a bit strong, and you can kind of tell when a leather-like (my guess) tube is being cut so it’s weird, but just keep talking to the team about nonsense and your mind will be off it. We discussed the holidays, kids (duh), cats, and then ice cream.
After cleaning myself off and dressing, they walked me out and I walked the five minute walk home, which took ten. It’s hard to describe the feeling, but I simply didn’t feel like I could move at more than a crawl.
The Emotional Bit
Waking up the next morning realizing you can no longer produce children is an odd feeling. I realize I’m still here to raise the children I have, but biologically speaking, my work is done.
You will not be working. You will feel like someone kicked you real good. Any attempt to get up and sit around will make it feel like someone kicked you even harder. Plan to be on the couch with a bunch of pillows propped under your butt in order to elevate the area. Tylenol and ice are also recommended (not Advil or Motrin because they thin the blood!). If you have kids, have help ready as you will not be giving them any attention today. You can sleep in your own bed.
Your boys will likely be black and blue, but if you did your icing yesterday you should be feeling much better. You’ll be a lot more mobile, but they’ll still let you know when you should get back to the couch. You can shower after 24 hours. Do it; you’ll feel wonderful.
You’ll wake feeling even better, but they’ll still let you know when it’s time to sit down. I was able to make breakfast and hold the baby, but they let me know to get back to the couch.
Pretty comfortable. Able to walk to town and back. Picking up both kids now. Can still tell something isn’t quite right and I wouldn’t want to be on my feet all day.
Barely noticing anything. Still quite swollen on one side, but walking is perfectly back to normal.
Two Months Later
I forgot this post, but a friend is about to go through the process and was curious what recovery might look like. I was going to link him here until I discovered I never published! I’m at two months almost to the day. It took an entire month before I could sit on the bike for any real time. I’ve gone for some short runs with what felt like mixed success, but I’m pretty sure if I had more time for them I’d be fine.
I still do get discomfort when a child or cat steps in the wrong spot. It’s not the entire area, just very specific spots.
In two weeks I provide a sample to see if any swimmers remain!